Weekend Writing Warriors: Snippet 195- Maryna
It’s time for Weekend Writing Warriors! Every Sunday, a bunch of writers post 8-10-sentence snippets from their WIPs on their blogs. There’s a lot of reading, commenting and great writing. Click on the link to see the full list.
Hey, I’m back! I took a few weeks off because I’m in the middle of cutting away or massively revising big chunks of Sword of Destiny. I’m wondering if it would be easier to just start over. I still don’t feel like posting snippets from that, so I’ve decided to revisit scenes from older books that I enjoyed writing. Hopefully they won’t be repeats, though if they are, it will be from several years ago.
So, this week I’m taking you back to Winter of the Wolf, book four in my very long, but very complete (yay!) Desolate Empire Series. The teenage Princess Maryna of Terragand (Kendryk and Gwynneth’s daughter) is traveling with Natalya, a powerful cleric on her way to visit the Empress Teodora. Sounds like a bad idea, doesn’t it? They’re on a ship heading Teodora’s way when they are overtaken by a fast, heavily armed vessel. While the captain orders battle stations, Natalya tells Maryna to go below and change into something nice.
“If we’re caught, you must look like a princess, not some sailor’s brat; we’ll have to do something about your hair too,” Natalya said.
Maryna couldn’t believe it. Not only was she about to miss out on a naval battle, she would be having her hair done while it was happening, “I don’t—”
“Shut up.” Natalya snapped, shoving Maryna toward the hatch, as she looked over her shoulder, out to sea.
Maryna squeaked in shock. Natalya had never spoken to her like that. But she turned to climb down the ladder, looking up at Natalya as she went down.
Natalya stared at her, her face white, her eyes wide, “Hurry now,” she said, “Change your clothes as quickly as you can; If I’m not mistaken, those are pirates.”
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Yes, I don’t think there is time to argue at this point. Best to listen and get out of the situation alive.
Exactly! It’s just painful to have to miss all of the “fun.”
This brings a question to mind: what is the appropriate hairstyle to wear for a pirate attack?
In this case, it turns out that keeping Maryna’s eyecatching locks completely out of sight is the way to go.
Just imagine how exciting this would all seem to Maryna. She’d have lived in a small, controlled and protected world. Here was brazen daring and adventure about to happen. Of course she doesn’t want to miss it. 🙂
Good writing–conveying that to the reader.
I am currently doing an outline as I once again read Dhor’en Sands. I have transitional errors. Yikes! This is the not-so-fun part of writing. 🙂
We will get there, my friend! 🙂
She’s had a few adventures already, but was forced to be pretty passive, so here’s a chance for glory!
Hang in there- editing can be brutal but the final product is worth it!
Aww, a little with Maryna on the point of missing all the action, but definitely sounds like she better do as told.
I had to tear apart my last wip after much deliberation, so I understand the feeling. Sometimes, it’s just what needs doing.
She’s still a little naive as to what a battle is really like.
I had to tear apart my first book like this, but haven’t had to do it since. Guess it’s best to not get complacent!
Ah, poor Maryna, but yeah she might want to listen.
Good luck with getting the book to come together as you want.
Thank you!
Always exciting. You bring the readers right into the scene!
Thanks, Charmaine!
At first I assumed that a bona-fide princess might have some authority over whoever was in that warship, but I kinda doubt that if they’re pirates. I guess the thinking is she’s more likely to be taken alive that way?
Maryna doesn’t have any real power just yet, while Natalya is famous for hers. And yes, the hope is to be taken alive and possibly ransomed.
Presumably Natalya knows what she’s doing. I’m not sure if a pretty dress will save Maryna from pirates! But they might keep her as a hostage.
That’s what they’re hoping! Look like someone with wealthy relatives willing to pay a ransom.
Great snippet. Natalya’s urgency was very convincing!
Thank you!
I think I’ve learned over the years anything to do with Teodora is a bad idea! Enjoyed the snippet and I feel sorry for your main character – I think her world is about to get a bit too ‘real’ for her very shortly.
You’ve got that right regarding Teodora! And yes, poor Maryna is about to have an unpleasant time.
I do want to know what attire is appropriate for a pirate attack. lol Great snippet. What is about to happen can’t be good- dressed for the occasion or not.
Something that makes you look rich and worth keeping alive!
Haha Yup. That’s Natalya, never mincing words.
Exciting and funny scene. What to wear (or how to wear one’s hair) during a pirate attack. Good snippet.
Such a fresh perspective, I hadn’t considered this before.
I’m impressed by the thoroughness and quality of your work.
The detailed analysis was incredibly helpful, thank you.