Weekend Writing Warriors: Snippet 102- More Winter of the Wolf

wewriwa2It’s time for Weekend Writing Warriors! Every Sunday, a bunch of writers post 8-10-sentence snippets from their WIPs on their blogs. There’s a lot of reading, commenting and great writing. Click on the link to see the full list.

Winter of the Wolf is off to beta readers! Whew! So it only seems right that I continue with a little teaser. Last week, 12-year-old Duke Devyn Bernotas was acting like a real brat. Braeden had him join the hunt for the deadly Daciana Tomescu, but there was no extra horse for him, so he had to double up with Trisa Torresia, Braeden’s best friend’s daughter, and his most trusted officer. Days later, there’s still no sign of Tomescu and Braeden can see Devyn is feeling down, so he goes over to talk to him while they’re taking a break. Some creative punctuation.

Devyn looked up at Braeden anxiously. “I’m not slowing you down, am I? It seemed like such a good idea—going along with you—but now I’m not sure; I hope I didn’t do the wrong thing.”

“It’s all right,” Braeden said, clapping him on the shoulder, realizing that all of Devyn’s bravado earlier had been just that. “When I was your age I would have done the same; it’s hard to stay put when there’s fun to be had.”

“I hope it’ll be fun, though I pictured it all rather differently. I thought I’d have my own horse and we’d go galloping through the forest, as if we were on a hunt.”

Braeden had to smile at that, “Well, this is a hunt all right, but our quarry is a bit more dangerous than a stag. If we see her, I want you to stay with Lieutenant Torresia, no matter what; can you promise me that?”

Devyn nodded, “she’s all right for a commoner, isn’t she?”

By the end of this book, Devyn’s attitude toward “commoners” will have undergone a radical shift.

Previous snippets are here.

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53 comments on “Weekend Writing Warriors: Snippet 102- More Winter of the Wolf
  1. Andrea R Huelsenbeck says:

    I like seeing this side of Devyn.

  2. calensariel says:

    Ah! the teaser’s in that last little line there, eh?

  3. Author Jessica E. Subject says:

    That last line says a lot. Nice snippet! 🙂

  4. Kris says:

    Loved how you were really able to encompass what a younger boy would have been picturing when thinking of the adventure of the hunt (vs reality). Looking forward to where this is going!

  5. Daryl Devore says:

    Last line says a lot in a few words. Tweeted.

  6. Jenna Jaxon says:

    Ah, the judgment of youth. I think he has some lessons to learn still. Great snippet.

  7. Seems as if this trip is going to involve a lot of growing up for Devyn. Well done snippet!

  8. Alexis Duran says:

    I can’t wait to read this book, Christina. Hope your beta readers are fast!

  9. He is learning several new things!

  10. Fallon says:

    Love the interaction between these two. Great snippet.

  11. A lesson for the young man and soon.

  12. Thank you for redeeming Devyn. lol. I’m glad he’s not the total snob I’d begun to fear he was. 🙂

  13. He’s not so bad, is he? Maybe a little immature, but I’m guessing that things will happen in the near future that mean he’ll have to grow up quite quickly.

  14. Cara Bristol says:

    Devyn turned out to be an OK kid.

  15. Karen Michelle Nutt says:

    I see there is hope for Devyn after all.

  16. Shari Elder says:

    Great last line. Tells us so much about the world and the characters.

  17. Like us all he has more than one side to him. And he is only twelve after all. Kids are only brats if they are brought up to be like that. I’m sure the experiences of riding with Braeden will make him grow up a bit. Good snippet.

    • Christina says:

      Very true! His parents are pretty down to earth for a prince and princess. Devyn gets most of his snobbishness from everyone else kowtowing to him. Braeden won’t though, which makes him a good influence.

  18. Great snippet! Braeden is definitely the person you want to be around if you’re interested in adventure and growing up. 😉

  19. Diane Burton says:

    Devyn is such a kid, but he’s growing up. Nice job.

  20. At least he recognizes that he did something he shouldn’t have–and is willing to make some compromises. Hopefully he keeps his word!

  21. The last line is revealing. I can’t wait for his attitude to change.

  22. Ed Hoornaert says:

    He’s more human here, though still rather arrogant. He has a few things to learn.

  23. Rin-Rin says:

    Yay! Another snippet with Braeden & Devyn. It seems like he still has a lot to learn but he is only 12. So that’s to be expected. XD …Great snippet!

  24. Great interaction between the two, Christina. You’ve done an excellent job of using the differences in speech patterns to show the age difference.

  25. Whitney says:

    I like the last little bit you added after the snippet. Can’t wait to get lost in this world again soon. 🙂 I’m also dropping a link to my snippet; apparently the form didn’t submit my link! http://witandtravesty.com/weekend-writing-warriors-snippet-63/

  26. S. M. Pace says:

    Certainly a big change in Devyn compared to last week. I like seeing characters undergoing big personality changes and how writers depict them. Nicely done.

  27. Nice characterization of Devyn. Enjoyed the snippet!

  28. Now this attitude I like, it shows that he’s really just a worried kid. Great snippet!

  29. A lot of naivete is present in that last line. It demonstrates good characterization. Nice snippet!

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